Til Death
by Sisimka
Summary: Aedan ponders philosphy and love in the Deep Roads. Rated M for: Suggestive themes Romance Aedan/Leliana and violence.
1. Chapter 1

_(Though the 'party' system in the game limits you to three companions and yourself for most quests, in my mind, except for particular situations, I imagined that all the companions participated at all times. Therefore, all of them are currently present in the Deep Roads.)_

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**'Til Death**

_(Part One)_

Aedan was leaning gingerly against the stone wall of the small alcove the companions had decided to camp in. None of them knew if it was truly night, it was always night in the Deep Roads, but they were exhausted and Wynne had not been able to cope with all their injuries yet.

His eyes were closed and he was trying, unsuccessfully, to relive in his mind the previous night. He was in love with Leliana; last night had only confirmed that for him. But the disparity between night and day was too great and though he'd much rather dwell upon the first night spent in Leliana's arms, images of darkspawn and the disturbing figure of the hopelessly tainted dwarf, Ruck, kept infringing upon his thoughts.

He opened his eyes and picked idly at the crust of blood and gore that clung to his armour, he would be sleeping in this tonight, as best he could. None of the companions dared to remove a single piece while the threat of darkspawn loomed near. They wouldn't have stopped at all if not for the need to rest.

Aedan glanced around the small hollow they had tucked themselves into. Alistair was similarly propped against the wall near the entrance. His eyes were closed and his chest rose and fell in the rhythm of sleep. Sten sat across from the ex-templar and though his eyes were closed, he did not look restful. The Qunari looked watchful.

Shale resembled nothing more than a pile of rock outside the alcove altogether. Aedan had never 'met' a golem before and as he considered their recent acquisition, he couldn't help the small smile that stretched his lips. Maker's breath but Shale made him laugh, particularly when the golem referred to him as 'it'. Aedan had found it so funny he'd started referring to Alistair as 'it' and his friend had joined in, referring to Sten as 'it'. The joke had, unfortunately, ended there. Sten didn't get it.

"Argh, leave off yer fussin', a bit of ale will fix what ails me." This was followed by a burst of gravelly laughter and the follow up, "Get it? Hahaha."

Aedan turned his attention to their newest companion, Oghren. The surly dwarf was pushing ineffectually at Wynne who was trying to check the bandage she had wrapped about his head. Aedan could hear Wynne's voice but not discern her words, only her tone. She was using her disapproving voice. And now she was turning around and coming towards him. Oh Maker, was he in for another tongue lashing as well? Wynne seemed to do nothing but lecture him lately whether it was what it means to be a Grey Warden or his relationship with Leliana. After listening politely to the first few minutes of that particular lecture he'd told her to stop meddling in his affairs.

She crouched down beside him and he saw the concerned look in her eyes as she channeled her mana and let a final heal spell wash over him. Aedan felt the tingle slip down the back of his neck and couldn't help the groan that escaped his lips as something in his side shifted, knit and ceased to plague him. Had he really been so tired he'd not even noticed a broken rib? The Deep Roads were going to be the death of them, he was sure of it.

Wynne gave voice to his thoughts, "I'm doing what I can, Aedan, but we should not linger here for long."

"Thank you Wynne, but I want you to rest before we move on. We won't make it much further without your ability to keep us on our feet." He said.

Wynne glanced over at Morrigan, who was curled up in the darkest recess of the cave, looking for all the world like she was asleep. Inclining her head toward the witch, Wynne said, "I have tried to convince Morrigan to learn one of my spells, but thus far she refuses. We could really use her help."

Aedan growled softly under his breath and said, "I will talk with her, Wynne." Though he still felt awkward around Morrigan, she had been more amenable of late, even pleasant. After it had become obvious that he and Leliana had eyes only for one another he'd endured quiet words, teasing and unwanted advice from most of his companions. He'd expected Morrigan's attitude toward him to become all the more cold and distant, but in fact it had not. She seemed more relaxed, and dare he think it, friendly? He shook his head, just one more indecipherable facet to Morrigan's personality.

He glanced at Wynne who had decided to sit next to him and noticed how weary she looked. That she had neglected to offer any unsolicited advice attested to just how tired she must be. He should let her rest, but he did have something he wanted to discuss with the mage, so he inquired softly, "Would you have a moment to talk, Wynne? If you're too tired, I'd understand…"

She turned her head toward him and smiled gently, "What's on your mind?"

Aedan lifted a hand to gesture the darkness about them, the alcove was lit only by a single torch and entrance was shrouded in shadow, and said, "I can't help but wonder what we are doing down here. Certainly, there are darkspawn about," he shuddered, "plenty of them, but this feels like catching water with a net. We should be up there," he lifted his hand toward the ceiling this time, gesturing vaguely, "The Blight is happening outside these tunnels, not within."

Wynne answered in that neutral tone of hers that meant 'I'm listening', "You gave your word to the dwarves, young man, that is why we are here."

Aedan looked at Wynn a moment before continuing, "See, that's the bit I don't really understand. Why am I suddenly responsible for putting two men on the throne?" He glanced over at Alistair, "As if getting one there weren't enough. Doesn't anyone understand that we are in the middle of a Blight?"

When he looked back at Wynne he saw she understood and her expression was sympathetic.

Aedan lowered his voice a little before continuing, "Do you think Bhelen is the right choice?" He glanced quickly at Oghren who was holding an upturned pouch over his mouth, squeezing and shaking the last drops of liquid out. Amber liquid, was that ale? Holy Maker, would he be able to lift that great axe of is anytime soon?

He looked back towards Wynne and said, "The dwarves seem to put little stock in blood relationships and though it is my first instinct to put a king's son on the throne, perhaps for Orzimmar it might not be the best choice?"

Wynne was still regarding him with a steady, quiet gaze and he realized she was waiting for the part he had not said yet. He lowered his voice a bit more, the words so soft he barely heard them himself, "Maybe the dwarves have the right of it? Maybe the blood isn't as important as the aptitude. Do you ever wonder if…maybe…" he hesitated and glanced over at his friend, the man he was trying to make king, and felt his cheeks flush, "maybe we should just let Anora rule instead?"

Aedan's gut twisted and he felt a sickening twinge of shame at his words. How could he be so disloyal? He glanced down at his hands, suddenly feeling he'd said too much, but these thoughts had plagued him the whole time they'd been in Orzimmar. How _did_ one decide who was fit to rule? In Ferelden that right had been decided by blood, but in Orzimmar they had other methods…and to Aedan's analytical mind, those methods held merit.

Wynne asked, "Do you think Alistair would be such a terrible king?" Her voice held no judgment, only simple curiosity.

Aedan studied Alistair then, and brought to mind all the reasons he felt the man should be king. Though his friend had slept in the stables until he was ten, he was the most noble man Aedan knew. Alistair always stood for what was right, no matter the consequences. He was comfortable with people and he could speak to commoners and nobles alike, with no division between social standing. He was a warrior of distinction, skilled with his sword and shield and was brave beyond measure. Alistair would not hesitate to lead his people into battle. He was smart, despite his naiveté, and could think his way out of almost any problem. What he didn't know, he would learn. And though it probably didn't count as a kingly attribute, Alistair was kind. He was a good man and a good friend. He cared for people and his heart would extend to all of Ferelden, of that Aedan was sure. Alistair would be a great king.

Aedan sighed with relief, his faith restored. He looked back towards Wynne and smiled, "No, I think Alistair will be a great king. Thank you, Wynne, you have been a help."

Wynne returned his smile and patted his arm, "All I did was listen, Aedan. But perhaps sometimes that is all that is necessary."

Aedan caught a fleeting expression of contrition in Wynne's eyes and raised his brows, "Oh?"

Wynne cleared her throat and said, "I owe you an apology."

Aedan was surprised and he asked, "What for?"

Wynne continued, "I was perhaps too harsh in my judgment of your…relationship with Leliana."

Aedan flushed again, he couldn't help it. Though it had been two weeks since Wynne had pulled him aside for that particular little conversation he hadn't entirely forgiven the mage her opinions.

When he remained silent, Wynne spoke again, "Seeing you two together… your happiness is like a light in all this darkness," she gestured the dark tunnel they were sitting in and Aedan understood her clearly. She finished with, "Cherish your time together Aedan…"

She did not have to add, 'it may not last'. He knew it, they all did. He forgave Wynne then; she'd only been looking out for them, as always. He patted her hand and said, "Thank you, Wynne."

Wynne looked wistful as she added, "If you truly love her Aedan, and I see that you do, tell her. Don't leave it too late."

Aedan blinked and nodded. He knew that there had been someone in Wynne's past and that the mage had a son, but she'd never elaborated on the relationship. He was about to ask, feeling that now might be the time to listen to her for a change, when there was a scuffle at the entrance to the alcove. He looked up and his heart filled as he broke into a smile. Leliana and Zevran had returned from patrol.

Patting Wynne's hand again, Aedan stood up and stepped toward the rogues. He suddenly felt awkward. He wanted to hug Leliana and kiss her and tell her how glad he was to see her safely returned, but this camp was such a confined space. They couldn't simply melt off into the woods together here, or slip into a deserted alleyway. Leliana displayed no such unease and stepped lightly up to him, and his arms circled her of their own accord. They hugged, and though he relished her closeness, their armour kept them apart. Aedan cleared his throat to ask, "What did you see?"

Zevran answered, "The tunnels are clear for quite some distance in every direction, how is your sense of the taint?"

Aedan said, "It's everywhere," he shivered, he'd never felt anything quite like the overwhelming and oppressive taint that seemed to hang in the very air of the Deep Roads. He continued, "But not close, I think, not right now…I think we should be safe to rest here a while."

Sten spoke up then and Aedan started, not having realized the Qunari was still awake, "Kadan, I will watch…sleep while you can. Nothing shall pass my blade without you knowing of it."

Aedan nodded quietly and faced those companions that were still awake, "Let's all get some rest," he said.

Leliana caught his hand and he allowed himself to be led away, only a short distance as the shallow tunnel allowed. They slid down the wall together, sitting side by side and in the quiet shadows he leaned over to kiss her softly. Their fingers were entwined and she squeezed his as they kissed. He broke off with a smile. He thought over Wynne's advice and though the words were on the tip of his tongue, he didn't want to say them here, not in a dark tunnel beneath the world. He wanted it to be special, like the night they'd shared their first kiss – the two of them alone with only the light of the moon upon them and the trees about them. He had to believe they'd have nights like that again.

Now that she was here beside him his senses filled with her and he easily remembered the night before. He should have told her then. They had been given rooms at the royal palace, courtesy of Prince Bhelen, and all the companions had relished the opportunity to enjoy a proper bath and a soft bed. Aedan had been simply reveling in the sensation of being clean and had been sitting quietly in his room lavishing attention on his weapons, buffing both his sword and dagger to a respectable shine when she'd knocked at his door.

He'd invited her in and had been unable to tear his eyes from the sight of her dressed in something other than her drakeskin armour. She was wearing a dress of the palest blue and the material was so fine thought that in the right light, he might actually be able to see through it. He'd simply said, "Wow."

She had chuckled softly and said, "I take it you approve!" He nodded, still unable to look away. He had then stepped forward and taken her into his arms, and kissed her deeply, his hands exploring the softness of her dress.

Leliana had eventually pulled away, with reluctance, and said, "We are going to be late to dinner…"

Aedan had shaken his head and caught her hands, pulling her back into his arms and whispered hoarsely, "Nope… not going… I've something entirely different in mind…"

Though they'd been extraordinarily hungry for breakfast and had endured the amused and questing glances of their companions, one missed meal paled in comparison to their first night together.

Leliana squeezed his fingers again and he brought his mind back to the dark alcove and looked over at her with a smile. He dropped another light kiss upon her lips and then leaned his head back against the wall and closed his eyes. He felt her lean gently against his side and they slept.


	2. Chapter 2

_I originally intended for this story to be only two parts, but found it needed three. Part three will be posted tomorrow (3/2).__

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_(Part Two)_

Aedan awoke to the sound of Oghren and Alistair engaged in a heated discussion. The two warriors were facing one another with Oghren's rather bulky pack on the floor between them. Alistair pointed towards it and said, "You've got more alcohol in there, haven't you?"

The dwarf burped loudly, patting his belly as if proud to have given birth to such an obnoxious sound, and then attempted to pull the straps away from the ex-templar's hands. He growled "So long as I'm the one carryin' it, what do you care what's in my pack?"

Alistair exclaimed, "Because the rest of us are carrying food and weapons and bandages! We're not here for a party, you know!"

Oghren growled, "More's the pity" and finally succeeded in yanking the pack from Alistair's grasp. He fished inside it and pulled out a strip of leather which he then proceeded to put between his teeth and chew on. His lips moved around the 'meal' and he said, "See, I got food in here too… want some?"

Alistair shuddered and stepped back saying, "I do not want to know what that is…"

Oghren continued to talk about the leathery strip, something he was quite accomplished at as his words were clear enough, "It's nug!" he said.

Aedan heard a soft gasp beside him and turned to find Leliana with her hand to her mouth, her expression one of alarm. She said, "You eat…nugs, those sweet little creatures? I thought they were kept as pets…"

Oghren slurped, and chewed, then tore the strip with his teeth, holding out the grisly end and gesturing with it, "Pets? Why would you keep food as a pet? Now this here is smoked nug, delicious with some lichen sauce, but just as good on its own. Can I tempt you with some, little lady?"

Even in the shadowed light Aedan could see the green tinge that coloured Leliana's cheeks and he patted her hand softly before turning to Oghren and politely refusing on her behalf. The dwarf simply shrugged and shoved the remaining morsel past his lips, chewing noisily and grumbling at the same time, "Suit yerself, when are we gonna start killin' some darkspawn?"

Alistair said, "Sooner than I'd like…" he glanced over at Aedan and raised a brow in question. Aedan then realized the nausea he'd been feeling wasn't all due to contemplation of Oghren's breakfast. Darkspawn were closing in on them, and from the feel of it, several of them. He nodded toward Alistair and stood up.

An eerie screech tore through the still air and a shriek appeared in the tunnel outside their camp. As one the companions reached for their weapons. A cool wind flew from the back of the alcove and the shriek froze in place, effectively blocking the passage. But as Wynne shattered the apparition, the four warriors leapt forward, their assortment of swords and axes all pointing toward the first darkspawn to round the bend. Alistair ran past the first genlock, leaving it to the scrappers and waded through the approaching band toward the largest hurlock. Aedan stunned the same genlock on his way past and followed him. He heard the thunk and clang of blades behind him and knew Sten and Oghren were finishing it off. He could hear Oghren hurling insults at the darkspawn and allowed a quick smile. Zevran could stop teasing him about being the noisiest warrior now…

A shadow slipped past him and Zevran materialized behind Alistair's target, flanking the hurlock and flurrying with his blades, before whirling off in the opposite direction to flank yet another darkspawn. An arrow streaked by Aedan's ear and buried itself in the eye of the darkspawn right in front of him, pausing the creature in the act of swinging its great axe. Aedan took the advantage and cut the creature down before stepping aside to dodge the blade of another hurlock. He tackled that one next and then stooped down to deliver a final blow to Leliana's latest victim. The genlock had been hurled to the floor by her arrow and he sliced through the exposed neck before it regained its feet.

Aedan had become oddly comforted by the appearance of Leliana's arrows. Not only did he appreciate her accuracy, but each whistling brush of air let him know she was still standing behind him, unharmed and in relative safety.

The ground shook beneath their feet as Shale lumbered about, knocking darkspawn senseless with mighty blows of his fists. Aedan was nearly thrown from his feet as one of these flying darkspawn crashed into his back and he cursed the narrowness of the tunnel. He and Alistair needed to devise some new battle strategies for these confined spaces, their usual formation, while not horribly ineffectual, could use some tweaking.

Their targets were easy to find, however, and the skirmish was over almost as quickly as it had begun. The companions stood still a moment, regaining their breath. Zevran blew out a gusty sigh and said, "Well that was… bracing. Nothing like a bit of exercise to start the day!"

Aedan scanned the collection of corpses at their feet and could only nod in silent agreement. Their second day in the bowels of the earth had not started in the most auspicious fashion. He looked up and checked on his companions. No one appeared injured and he caught Wynne's eye. She nodded, all was well. He sheathed his blades and turned towards Morrigan, they were going to have that talk now.

Morrigan acceded to his request with little persuasion saying only, "If I must…" and she and Wynne sequestered themselves in the alcove while the remainder of the companions collected their packs. Aedan called a meeting and they hunkered down in a loose circle to talk strategy.

Shortly afterwards the companions retraced their steps to the cavern they'd entered yesterday and Aedan guided them away from the alcove were he assumed Ruck was still lurking. He did not want to see the tainted dwarf again, the sadness of it was too wrenching and he'd still not decided what he'd tell Ruck's mother when they returned to Orzimmar.

They crossed one of the bridges they'd cleared of ghostly guardians the day before and contemplated the next dark tunnel. Aedan could feel the taint all about him, faintly, but he sensed something more was lurking in the darkness ahead. They'd not taken more than a handful of steps into the tunnel before he and Alistair discerned the source of the taint. A faint sound had reached their ears, the now familiar hissing and skittering of many legs.

They turned toward one another and said at the same moment, "Spiders."

More corrupted spiders. Aedan pushed aside his growing unease and drew his weapons. As they advanced down the tunnel, however, the spiders ran before them, as if they were being chased. Aedan couldn't help but look over his shoulder, was there something more terrible creeping up behind them? But he saw only his companions and after allowing his gaze to linger a moment longer than necessary on Leliana's face, he looked forward again. Alistair chanced a swipe at one of the retreating spiders, but missed as the corrupted creature suddenly shot into the air above their heads, disappearing from view as it nestled into a dark crevice. Not good, not good at all. Aedan picked up the pace. He did not want to be caught in this tunnel if more than one spider decided to drop back down on them.

Spiders continued to disappear before and above them as they made their way through the tunnel and when they emerged into another large cavern the silence was eerie. A chasm separated the tunnel from the cavern and could only be traversed using a small stone bridge. As Aedan stepped onto the bridge a loud dwarven curse broke the silence.

"Thunderhumper!"

This was followed by the hiss and screech of spiders as they descended from the crevices and fissures in the tunnel ceiling, falling upon the remainder of the companions in a frenzied rush. Morrigan threw up her arms and cast a mind blast spell, stunning a few of the creatures. The companions worked in their new groupings, tackling the spiders two by two until they were dead. The fight was mercifully short, but the ambush had shaken them and Aedan allowed a few minutes recovery before they continued over the bridge into the cavern.

A lone darkspawn awaited them, standing on a stone dais surrounded by fallen rock and buckled iron plates. Once again Morrigan cast the first spell, encasing the emissary in a crushing prison while the rest of the companions surrounded it, hacking away with abandon. The spell fizzled before the emissary took its last breath and it managed to reciprocate, trapping the witch in a crushing prison of her very own before succumbing to the flurry of blades.

Before anyone had the chance to do more than draw a breath, there was a hissing sound from behind the fallen rock, followed by that awful skittering. Aedan whispered, "Andraste's flaming sword, more spiders," under his breath and stepped over the darkspawn body. He rounded a lopsided stone column and stopped still, Alistair bumping him lightly, as he came face to face with the largest spider he'd ever seen. Alistair leapt past him to engage the corrupted queen, but not before she summoned her minions to distract the companions.

The battle was long and arduous. Every time Aedan thought Alistair was about to deliver the final blow, they were encased in sticky strands of webbing as the queen ascended to the high ceiling to taunt them from above. Another wave of smaller spiders would follow before she descended again.

Aedan had dispatched one of the smaller spiders and stepped toward Alistair to help finish off the corrupted queen when he noticed arrows were no longer streaking into the fray. He chanced a look over his shoulder and saw that Leliana had been overwhelmed by one of the queen's minions. Aedan froze with his blades pointed in two directions, one toward Alistair and one toward Leliana. His mind knew where he should be: at Alistair's side, finishing this battle. Logically once the queen was dead her hold over the smaller spiders would be broken. But his heart knew where he wanted to be: saving his love from grievous injury.

Alistair broke the impasse by calling out, "Aedan, are you stunned? I could use a…" then he was engulfed in webbing as the queen ascended once again. Aedan was horrified by his inaction. While he had stood motionless Alistair might have been killed, or seriously wounded. They were a team, they all had their jobs in battle and his was to be at Alistair's side, not to rescue Leliana. Zevran would be there, it was his job to keep an eye on their back line. But Aedan couldn't help glancing over his shoulder again and his relief at seeing Zevran help the bard to her feet nearly robbed him of breath. He then stepped forward and used his dagger to slice away at the webbing that surrounded Alistair.

Alistair grabbed his forearm and Aedan could feel the warrior's concern and looked up to meet his gaze. "Are you alright?" Alistair asked.

Aedan gave a short nod and looked up, trying to direct his friend's eyes elsewhere. His heart had not ceased to pound and he knew his anxiety was not entirely fueled by the battle. The rush of blood in his ears slowly subsided as the eerie silence stretched out.

"We showed that pile of bronto…" Oghren was cut off by a loud hissing and the queen descended once again. The huge spider was alone and all the companions set to finishing the fight. As the final blow was struck, however, they discovered there was to be no respite as Alistair was caught and paralyzed by a spell, thus announcing the presence of yet another emissary.

The ex-templar twitched and jerked in his prison as the party rounded the last pile of fallen rock and found their target. The emissary was quickly dispatched, but no one had been able to break the spell surrounding Alistair and he dropped limply to the ground.

Wynne knelt by Alistair and the companions crowded around, all exchanging worried expressions. Perhaps with the exception of Oghren, they were united in their purpose of bringing Alistair to the throne of Ferelden. Though it was but a stepping stone in their plan to defeat the Blight, it was an important one. As one, they held their breath until Wynne looked up and nodded, relief washing over her features. As one, their shoulders slumped and their sighed breaths sounded in the quiet cavern.

Aedan suspected none were more relieved than he, however, as it has been his failure to act that had allowed Alistair to expend too much of himself in the fight with the queen spider. Alistair had drained his reserves and been unable to resist the spell. Aedan glanced at Morrigan, briefly entertaining the notion that she could have helped, perhaps used her one spell of healing, but saw instantly that the witch was as weary as the rest of them. He had no one to blame but himself. Feeling the need for action Aedan beckoned Zevran to his side and said, "Let us scout the perimeter of this cavern while the taint is barely discernable."

Aedan paused at Leliana's side and placed a hand on her shoulder. She was covered in black spider ichor and sticky strands of webbing, but she appeared otherwise unharmed. She looked up and they stared wordlessly at one another for a moment before he squeezed her shoulder and let go, jogging a step to catch up with the elven rogue.

They'd crossed the cavern when Zevran paused and Aedan was instantly on alert, reaching with his senses for the taint. He felt nothing and glanced at the elf curiously. Zevran was regarding him with a serious expression on his face and he said quietly, "I would not let her fall, my friend, not while I still drew breath."

Aedan nodded and then sighed, unable to stop the quiet rush of air from his lips as the last of his tension drained from his shoulders. He said, "Zev, what if it happens again? Alistair could have died! Wynne warned me about this and I didn't listen. There is too much at stake here for me to be wandering around like a lovesick puppy."

Zevran did not answer him but merely stood there, those amber eyes gazing at him thoughtfully. Aedan looked away and caught his breath. His heart had begun to pound again and it hurt. He felt tears pricking the corners of his eyes and did not know if they were from the shame of his near failure or the heartbreak of the choice felt he must make. He finally whispered, "I…I have to let her go…"


	3. Chapter 3

_So I'm going to stop guessing how many parts there will be to this story and just keep writing until it's done. _

_(Part Three)_

Aedan and Zevran confirmed the cavern was clear of immediate threat and returned to find that Alistair was just coming out of his stupor. Wynne was by his side but the rest of the companions were seated about on rocks and the floor tending to weapons, minor injuries and thirst. Aedan knelt next to Wynne and put a hand on her shoulder. She nodded at him and moved a short distance away, sinking to the floor and resting her head against some tumbled rock, closing her eyes to meditate.

Aedan helped Alistair to sit up and then took a seat beside his friend and offered him a drink. Alistair normally had a witty retort or humorous quip prepared for any situation, but he was quiet now. He simply rested a moment, cup in hand, eyes closed as he seemingly savored the water. When he opened his eyes again, he turned and looked at Aedan and said, "What happened to you?"

Aedan couldn't help himself, he glanced across at Leliana before returning his gaze to Alistair and saying, "I was distracted." Aedan dropped his eyes and spoke to the floor between them, "Alistair, forgive me. It won't happen again. I can't begin to describe the shame…our duty is more important than my lovesick heart." He looked up again and continued, "I will end this thing with Leliana and see our quest through."

Alistair scoffed quietly at him and said, "And follow me around like a whipped puppy instead?"

Aedan quirked his brows and said, "I…"

Alistair passed him the cup and then took his arm and said, "Aedan, everyone makes mistakes."

Aedan drew in a sharp breath and replied, "My mistake nearly got you killed. You're going to be King!"

"Do you think making me King is all it will take to stop the Blight?" Alistair asked.

Aedan thought murmured, "No…I don't know." Aedan threw up his hands, "I have to make Bhelen King or we won't get our army and I have to make you King or Ferelden will dissolve into civil war. Then we stop the Blight." He looked at his friend then, looked Alistair in the eyes and said, "Regardless of what you might become, you're my friend, Alistair, and I let you down."

Alistair nodded carefully and then said, "I'd be lying if I said I kept my head in every battle. None of us is perfect." He paused and then added, "Aedan, the world would go on without me. I'm not trying to say I'm ready to leave it just yet, but…I'm just a stepping stone." Alistair rubbed his forehead as if it pained him.

Aedan was concerned and was about to beckon Wynne when Alistair waved a hand at him and continued, "No don't. I'm fine, really. You take too much upon yourself Aedan, you always do. The fate of Ferelden does not rest solely in your hands, or on my shoulders for that matter. We're part of a team," Alistair indicated their companions. His eyes rested on Leliana a moment and Aedan followed his gaze. Leliana was talking with Zevran, the rogues' heads were bent toward one another and they were gesturing at their daggers.

"If either of us falls before we see this thing through, we have to trust in our companions to see this quest to the end. Just as we trust them to watch our backs every time we fight," Alistair said.

Aedan nodded thoughtfully, considering his friend's words. He was right…

Alistair spoke again, "I can teach you some mental techniques, some of the focus I use in battle."

Aedan looked back at Alistair with surprise. Was Alistair really suggesting that he did not need to sacrifice his heart's desire? Or was he jumping to the conclusion he wanted to hear…

He said, "I…ah…thank you, Alistair. Do you…do you think that would help? I mean, could I…"

Alistair confirmed his suspicion, "Don't destroy the one thing that has brought you happiness over this past year, Aedan, not for me," he gestured the deep, dark cavern, "Not for this. Let it make you stronger, let it be something else to fight for."

Aedan was overcome by Alistair's words and was unable to answer. He looked away from his friend and spent a moment composing his expression. Though his heart was lightened, he couldn't help the twinge of guilt over the joy he felt when allowing himself to contemplate the idea of being able to keep his love.

The companions rested for an hour or so, taking the time to eat and check over their gear before they set off toward the other side of the cavern. They'd not gone far when they came across another campsite and Oghren thrust his way to the front of the group, planting himself in front of what looked like a journal. Everyone stood a respectful distance back as the dwarf read what might be Branka's last words.

Aedan finally took a step forward and leaned over Oghren's shoulder. He lifted a hand, unsure whether to comfort their newest companion or not, then dropped it back to his side. Oghren was muttering to himself, a combination of curses and…endearments? Aedan cleared his throat and Oghren looked up. He said, "She's in the Dead Trenches."

Alistair said from behind them, "The 'Dead Trenches'? Who names these places?" He shuddered.

Aedan shared in his apprehension, the name _was_ disturbing. He said quietly, "Does she mention the Anvil of the Void?" He grimaced as he remembered Alistair's reaction to that particular designation.

"Yeah, sounds like she found a clue…" Oghren looked up and pointed toward a dark opening yawning in the shadows on the far side of the cavern. "We need to go that way."

Aedan spent most of the afternoon walking beside Alistair, as was their usual habit. The ex-templar took the opportunity to share some of his training in focus and mental fortitude. He described a specific technique and then said, "Try it now…"

Aedan tried to clear his mind, but that which he tried hardest not to think about came unbidden. Leliana and their first night together. The memory of his first glimpse of her unclothed as the soft blue material of her dress had slipped from her shoulders and pooled about her feet on the floor. The incredible softness of her skin. Leliana tugging his shirt up over his head. The feel of her hands on his bare chest. The touch of her lips, the look on her face as he…

Aedan groaned and Alistair looked sharply over at him and said, "It's not supposed to hurt Aedan, you're trying too hard."

Aedan swallowed drily and tried again…

They came to a fork in the tunnel and Aedan paused to ask Oghren for directions. As he turned to find the dwarf his eyes had passed over Leliana and he paused. Maker, he was lost… No amount of mental fortitude could prevent him from thinking of her! He quickly averted his eyes, seeking Oghren and asking, "Which way?"

"How should I know?" the dwarf grumbled stomping forward and peering down each direction. He licked his finger and stuck it in the air a moment then nodded and pointed to the right, "That way."

Aedan glanced at Alistair and the ex-templar shrugged. They turned right. Aedan continued to practice the mental exercises, but thoughts of Leliana plagued him. He gave up and walked in moody silence instead and Alistair indulged him, obviously content to contemplate his own thoughts.

They traversed more tunnels and narrow corridors for the rest of the afternoon before coming upon another section of the long abandoned road, this one in worse condition than those before it. It was studded with niches and alcoves, however and after inspecting a couple the companions chose one in which to make camp.

Zevran offered to take first watch and Oghren opted to join him. It was an odd pairing and yet as the two walked toward the mouth of the cave they seemed easy in one another's company. Every one settled down, removing the packs and in the case of the warriors, loosening their armour a little. Food and drink was passed around. Though they'd seen no further fighting, everyone showed signs of fatigue and it was a quiet meal.

Aedan had hesitated in entrance, looking between Alistair and Leliana, not sure where to sit. Alistair glanced up at him, saw the direction his eyes were traveling and took it upon himself to move toward Wynne, leaving Aedan the option to sit with Leliana. Aedan sat down with a soft sigh and turned to look at Leliana. She was regarding him with a bemused expression. He reached over and touched her cheek, gently, and said, "Leli."

She lifted her hand and placed it over his and tilted her head, leaning against their hands. Her eyes were questioning and Aedan closed his against the onslaught of wrenching emotion that swirled within. He wished desperately to be any place other than the Deep Roads, crammed into a dark tunnel with eight other people.

How could so much change in the course of a single day? This time yesterday he'd been thinking about how much he loved this woman and planning how he would tell her those three little words. And now, when he wasn't thinking about undressing her, he was tormented by the thought that he shouldn't be saying those words at all. He shouldn't even be thinking them. He should be focused on putting people on thrones and defeating the archdemon.

"Aedan?" Her voice was soft and he opened his eyes. He was so weary and so lost in his thoughts he might have actually drifted off to sleep had she not spoken. Her fingers were still over his, though their hands now rested between them, and he lifted them to his lips, kissing them softly.

He smiled at her then, a weary, sad smile, but one that was returned. He said, "Let's get some sleep while we can." She leaned against his side and he dropped his head against the wall behind him and closed his eyes.

They were awakened by darkspawn and Aedan scrambled to his feet, quickly tightening his armour before reaching for his weapons. He shook his head to clear the last dregs of sleep and stepped outside the alcove. Alistair and Morrigan had relieved the watch and were holding off a small group of genlocks. They were quickly joined by the rest of the companions and the battle was short. It wasn't until afterwards that Aedan noted he'd not thought of Leliana once. He'd been focused and intent, Alistair's technique had helped him narrow his thoughts. He'd apparently done it instinctively, without having to try so hard. He didn't believe it would always be this easy, but it gave him hope.

Alistair wiped off his blade and looked up as if surprised to see Aedan standing there. He smiled and said, "You're awake! Let's get a move on."

They encountered several small bands of darkspawn and each time Aedan practiced his focus. He faltered now and again, but not disastrously, and he found the less he tried, the easier it came.

Eventually the road began to descend and the air about them grew close, warmer and thick with the taint. Aedan glanced at Alistair and saw his fellow warden felt it too. They were approaching something awful. The road deteriorated and the walls began to give way to unadorned rock once again. The atmosphere became almost oppressive and Aedan began to feel nauseas, his breath coming in short gasps.

Alistair stopped, putting a hand against the wall and leaning into it as he tried to catch his breath. Aedan stopped beside him, similarly affected and the other companions exchanged concerned glances. Zevran stepped forward, his expression grave, and placed a hand on Aedan's arm, drawing his attention.

"Warden, what ails you?" the Antivan asked softly. Leliana was poised just behind him and Aedan gazed at her face, using her loveliness as a focus this time and was mildly surprised when it helped. He smiled weakly at her in what he hoped was a reassuring fashion and returned his attention to Zevran.

"The taint," he said, gesturing the close air around them, "It's everywhere, get everyone ready…"

Aedan turned to Alistair and helped steady the man. Alistair had closed his eyes and when he opened them he smiled wryly and said, "So, how are those mental focus techniques working for you?"

Aedan allowed a small grin as they drew their weapons and moved forward. Though Aedan had the sense they were still walking downward, the tunnel began to widen around them in every direction. The ceiling lifted and the walls parted away from them and the road opened up into an enormous cavern, larger than any they had yet come across. The vista before them was nothing short of 'awesome'. Across the wide crevasse a stone bridge led towards the steps of an ancient dwarven fortress. It was quite possibly the most grand structure, despite its current state of ruin, that Aedan had ever seen.

"Bownammar," Oghren provided in a gravelly whisper, "Once home to the Legion of the Dead."

One wall of the tunnel had petered out along the edge of the crevasse. It was from this gaping chasm that the taint felt strongest and Aedan was unable to resist the pull. He and Alistair walked towards the edge as if hypnotized and only stopped when they felt their companions pulling on their arms. Leaning forward, Aedan peered down and a wave of terror washed through him, shaking him so badly that he sank to his knees. To either side of the lava that flowed along the centre of the ravine, so far down they were barely visible, marched a vast army of darkspawn. The stench of the taint was so strong he felt he might drown in it.

Alistair had dropped beside him and only the steadying hands of their companions were holding them back from the 'Dead Trench'. Alistair murmured, "I think I understand the name now."

Just as Aedan felt he might be learning to draw breath again, an awful shrieking roar split the air. Everyone looked up and their nightmares became real. A large dragon was swooping down the length of the crevasse and each beat of its mighty wings stirred the air upwards and across, washing the taint over them in waves. The dragon roared again and circled above its troops before angling upwards to alight on the bridge. It swung its great red-scaled head, maw open wide, and belched forth a billowing cloud of purple fire.

It was the archdemon. The creature from their dreams made real. Aedan wrenched his gaze away from the dragon and looked up at the companions clustered behind them. They were all staring at the bridge. Zevran's mouth gaped; Aedan had never seen the elf look stunned before. Leliana wrung her hands together and Wynne looked faint. Of all the people clustered behind him only Sten looked impassive, but he was looking at the dragon, there was no doubt about the direction of the Qunari's gaze.

Aedan said to Alistair, "They can see it. We can all see it…" Only then did he realize he was making little sense and he shook his head, it was hard to think over the swirling panic rising inside of him and the noise of the dragon on the bridge. He said, "I hoped I was dreaming, I'm not dreaming?"

Alistair looked at him and shook his head sadly, then looked back, Aedan following his gaze as the archdemon launched itself from the bridge and flew down the gaping chasm again, purple flames licking along the steep walls and curling above the heads of the darkspawn army. The dragon was rallying its forces and with a final reverberating bellow flew the length of the ravine again and then upwards disappearing into the far side of the cavern.

"Maker's breath," breathed Alistair. Aedan was beyond words. He could not tear his eyes from the far side of the cavern and the large fissure that had swallowed the archdemon, the same exit the army was marching towards. Did it lead upwards into the world above? Or would they have to face the horde before they left the Deep Roads?

Strangely, their reasons for being down here started to seem rather…insignificant.

The archdemon's departure had lifted the oppressiveness of the taint to some degree and Aedan inched back from the edge of the chasm. His legs were a little shaky as he gained his feet. He and Alistair steadied one another and with the help of their friends walked away from the sight of the lava and the teeming darkspawn.

Leliana moved up beside him, her face full of concern and without thinking Aedan reached out for her, engulfing her in his arms. Wynne and Zevran were at Alistair's side and the companions stood still and ready, offering their silent support as the two wardens recovered.

Alistair spoke first, "_That_ was the archdemon," he stated flatly. Everyone exchanged disturbed glances and more than one person shivered. He continued, turning to face Aedan "Was coming down here a mistake? We're not somehow responsible for releasing an Old God?"

Aedan shook his head and replied, "Is it any better to hope it was already on its way to the surface when we arrived?"


	4. Chapter 4

_Well, this one got all 'thinky' on me. Yeah, I know, I've been down that road before…_

_(Part Four)_

_First day, they come and catch everyone. _

_Second day, they beat us and eat some for meat. _

Aedan gasped and opened his eyes. He shuddered in horror at the memory that had awakened him, how could he have fallen asleep? He'd never wanted to close his eyes again, not after what they'd seen… He lifted a hand to rub at his face and grimaced at the dark stains on his fingers. Even in the dim light of the torch he could see how filthy they were. The odor that arose from his armour, from himself, as he lifted his hand was no more pleasant. He heard a soft whimper and glanced beside him. Leliana was there, she had not been when he first sat to watch, she must have moved up after he'd fallen asleep. Though her eyes were closed in sleep, her expression was not restful. Her face was pinched and her lips twitched. Her shoulders hitched slightly and she sighed. Aedan smoothed a strand of hair from her face, pausing to rub his thumb gently over a smudge on her cheek.

They were all grimy and stained. There were no baths in the Deep Roads. There was nothing but death and a steady descent into madness. They had lost all awareness of time and rested now only because they could. As if its presence heralded the way of things to come, there had been little or no respite since they'd seen the archdemon.

"Kadan?" A deep, soft voice, a sound so foreign to his current train of thought Aedan barely recognised it for what it was. He looked up. Sten was regarding him curiously with those purple eyes of his. The state of the Qunari warrior was a clear testament to the trials they had faced. His armour lay in a pile beside him and his side was bandaged with dirty linen strips stained dark with blood.

Aedan replied with, "Sten, are you well?"

Sten nodded quietly and enquired whether Aedan would take the watch. Aedan nodded swiftly, tendering an apology, "Thank you, Sten, I will endeavor to stay awake this time."

The Qunari simply nodded and then dropped his head back against the wall and closed his eyes. Aedan moved his gaze further back into the shallow cave they had chosen to rest in. Alistair was on the other side of Leliana and he appeared to be sleeping. His expression reflected the disturbing nature of his dreams, however. Further back Aedan saw Wynne. She was awake and he met her eyes. She did not see him for a moment and then she came back to herself. Her face did not change. She merely nodded wearily at him and let her eyes fall closed.

Two vague shapes beside her would be Morrigan and Zevran, both reclined into the shadows. He hoped they were sleeping. Oghren was across from him, a little aside from Sten. The dwarf was half sitting, half slumped against the stone wall, his legs out before him and his head thrown back. His mouth was open and he was snoring. Across his lap lay an enormous hammer and his hands twitched over it now and again.

Aedan glanced back toward the mouth of the cave. Shale would be out there, somewhere. The golem was their vanguard, the companion's first line of defense should anything disturb their rest.

This had been their first opportunity to lay down their weapons and loosen their armour since crossing the bridge into Bownammar. As his mind ranged over the events that had brought them this far, to this state of unease and unrest, Aedan could not help the shiver that crept down his spine. Ferelden seemed a fond, but distant memory. Their world now consisted of shadowed corridors and darkened niches, every new opening holding another trap, another horror. It was like a nightmare from which he could not awaken and Aedan despaired of ever seeing the sky again. He did not want to die down here…

_Third day, the men are all gnawed on again. _

_Fourth day, we wait and fear for our fate. _

Nor did he want to remain here. He thought of the Legion of the Dead. They had met the legendary soldiers at the bridge and had helped them to advance their line to the other side. The battle, while arduous had been straightforward and the chance to vent their anxiety against the darkspawn had helped to clear his and Alistair's heads from the encounter with the archdemon. The dedicated dwarves would venture no further, however, and Aedan had not pressed. They had their duty and he had his.

The doors to the great fortress had been sealed in an effort to stem the tide of darkspawn, but the Deep Roads were riddled with tunnels and the soaring rock walls either side of Bownammar had been no exception. They had located a narrow fissure and slipped through. Darkspawn scattered ahead of them and Alistair had run after the fleeing genlocks leading the companions directly into the first trap.

The corridor had opened out into another cavern, one littered with darkspawn. With little time to coordinate strategy they had thrown themselves into the fray, first coming to Alistair's aid and then branching off to deal with the genlocks peppering their party with arrows. Then came the bronto, and as if that wasn't enough to contend with, as the fight spilled out into the cavern they drew the attention of the emissaries and an ogre. It was a bloody mess, literally.

Aedan had slumped to the ground beside his friend and with a hint of a smile had said, "If you ever think about chasing a running genlock again, don't."

"What and spoil the surprise?" Alistair had quipped and they had laughed together, hoarse breathless gasps, but laughter none the less. They'd received a sharp glance from Wynne who was setting Oghren's arm and a positively malicious glare from Morrigan who was also putting her one healing spell to work. Zevran and Leliana had both looked at them with raised eyebrows, no more. Sten may have been another golem and had regarded them as stonily as Shale.

This had only increased their hilarity and they'd leaned against one another, chuckling and chortling until they had to stop and draw breath. It had been a release of tension, no more, no less. The archdemon had shaken them both to the core. They had not known what they had been walking towards…

And so began their plunge into insanity. There had been no time for thought, no time for introspection. No time for recriminations. No more humour. They fought and they bled, they healed and fought again. Every door they opened presented fresh horrors, diabolical traps and wave after wave of darkspawn. Tunnels dead ended and paths fell over cliffs, jagged ravines parted bridges and falls of rock turned their steps aside.

One of the darkspawn had been an ancient and formidable opponent, one that had nearly felled their entire party single handedly. They had recovered an interesting artifact from its body, the blade of a sword. It bore the same markings as the hilt Aedan had found and he tucked it into his pack to examine more closely later. The forge master had been another long and exhausting battle, but had netted Oghren the new hammer he now clutched reverently in his sleeping hands.

_Fifth day, they return and it's another girl's turn. _

_Sixth day, her screams we hear in our dreams. _

The whispering screams had been their only warning when they had been ambushed by shrieks, a fight so long and so devastating Aedan had feared for all their lives. Only he and Sten had been standing at the end, even Wynne had been knocked unconscious. It was a much subdued group that huddled in the middle of the crumbled bridge afterwards, starting in turns at every whisper of sound.

The lull had been brief, however, as Aedan had urged his companions forward off the bridge feeling their position was too exposed, and into yet more combat, this time with ghostly skeletons. It was after that, as the party had turned into yet another series of tunnels, the eerie voice had started.

"Does anyone else…hear something?" Zevran had been the first to ask.

_Seventh day, she grew as in her mouth they spew. _

_Eighth day, we hated as she is violated. _

"Thank the Maker, I thought I was imagining it," Leliana had responded, her face a mask of relief, an expression that had faded quickly, however, as the companions had stopped to actually listen to the words.

"Tis not a pleasant rhyme," had been Morrigan's reaction and Wynne had uttered an agreement there.

As they had ventured deeper into the tunnels the voice had seemingly hovered before them, drawing them on. They'd fought the ghostly legionnaires and more ogres before they had picked up the trail again, following the whispered words to Hespith.

Poor tainted Ruck paled in comparison to the horror and betrayal Hespith had endured, and at the hands of Branka, the paragon they sought, no less. Oghren had demanded answers from his ex-wife's lover and captain, but what Hespith had told them made little or no sense…until they'd seen the Broodmother.

_Ninth day, she grins and devours her kin. _

_Now she does feast, as she's become the beast._

The entire cavern that housed the horrendous creature had been draped with fleshy stands and ropes as if a giant belly had been opened and had spewed its guts upon the floor. The floor, Aedan didn't like to remember the floor, squelched beneath their boots. The smell was shocking and Aedan had not been the first one to gag. Then the tentacles had appeared, thrusting out of the floor as if drawn to their presence, knocking the companions about like playthings. The battle had been the hardest the companions had ever fought. The bulky layers of flesh had resisted their weapons and when the tentacles weren't distracting them, the darkspawn were.

Sten had been caught up in the Broodmother's grasp and when he'd hit the floor afterwards, even Wynne had not been able to revive him. Oghren had taken hit after hit, only his berserk fury keeping him on his feet. Zevran had been knocked unconscious. Aedan had taken the rogue's place, protecting the back line. Morrigan had been the last to fall, just as Aedan had reached her side and he'd beheaded the genlock responsible with a furious cross sweep of his blades. Then the fight had been over and one by one the companions had been revived. Together they'd limped to this shallow cave.

Aedan shuddered and closed his eyes, then opened them again with a jerk of his head as the grotesque image of the Broodmother filled his mind and the last words of Hespith's rhyme echoed in his ears. Provided he lived to see daylight again, he did not think he'd ever likely forget what had awaited them in that cave. He swallowed against the bile rising in his throat and forced the thoughts aside again. But his movement had woken Leliana and she stirred next to him, opening her eyes with a quick gasp, her hand flying to her mouth. Aedan glanced over at her she met his eyes. They didn't speak…words couldn't even begin to cover what they had seen.

Their last quest had taken them to the most holy relic in all of Thedas, the ashes of the Sacred Andraste, the bride of the Maker. Their passage into the Deep Roads could not have contrasted more sharply. What they had seen down here, what they had endured, what they had heard, would be etched forever in their memories. Aedan felt especially for Leliana, the bard had a mind for detail and story and of all of them she'd probably found the obsessive chanting of Hespith the most disturbing. Aedan took her hand now, and interlaced her fingers with his own. A simple gesture, but one that represented the sweetness and innocence he felt they'd all lost on this journey.

The rest of the companions began to wake and though none of them looked particularly rested, at least they looked a little less haunted.

"By the stone, Branka has a lot of answer for when we catch up with her…" growled Oghren. The dwarf had only slept after drinking himself into a stupor and the party had willingly indulged him. Despite the snoring, a well rested Oghren was much preferable to a sober and exhausted Oghren. He was shaking his head and grumbling now, searching through his pack and though Aedan hoped he wasn't looking for another drink, he would not have lifted a hand to stop him.

"We must leave this place." Sten broke in and all heads turned toward him. He continued, "We waste time down here… if we fall to this madness then who will defeat the Blight?"

Alistair was nodding toward the Qunari and said, "What if there are more of them…that thing? The archdemon is up there," he gestured vaguely toward the ceiling, "I fear Branka will be in worse shape than Hespith when we find her… if we find her…" he trailed off.

Zevran was watching the exchange silently while picking at his nails with his dagger. Morrigan spoke up.

"For once, I agree with you Alistair. We should leave this place. If this Bhelen really needs the support of a mad paragon to make him king, his claim is weak." She shrugged indolently. Zevran acknowledged her words with a nod. He'd made a similar comment before they'd left Orzammar.

Alistair glanced at Morrigan in surprise and she inclined her head toward him as if to say, 'Oh yes, I do occasionally think of something besides turning you into a frog.'

Oghren had succeeded in pulling a flask from his pack which he uncorked with his teeth. He spat the plug aside and growled, "Well I'm not gonna stop you, but I've come this far and I intend to find that bloody woman. You can all go back to yer sodding Blight if you want…"

Alistair blinked and said, "It's not just 'our' Blight! But that's beside the point, here… and now. We can't leave you down here by yourself," he glanced at Aedan and continued, "Can we?"

Sten growled and started putting his armour back on over his bandages and Wynne hurried forward to check his wounds. Aedan looked at each of his companions in turn, studying their grimy, weary faces. He fought the insane urge to chuckle. They were all regarding him with such serious expressions and they were all so filthy! Alistair's armour was blackened with blood and Morrigan's robes were torn. He couldn't even remember what colour Wynne's robe had been. The rogue's leathers were stained and creased and the combined odor of their unwashed bodies was cloying, even over the pervasive reek that filled the Deep Roads. Hair was matted to heads and Zevran was not the only one that needed to clean his nails.

He stopped at Wynne's cool blue gaze. Her voice floated in the back of his mind, a comment she'd made only days ago, what now seemed like weeks, 'because you gave your word…'

A new voice sounded quietly from beyond the mouth of the cave, "Sounds like it has a bit of a dilemma…" Shale had returned.

Leliana squeezed his fingers and Aedan looked down at their hands.

When he looked up they were all still watching him and Aedan felt the weight of each and every one of their gazes. They were waiting for his decision. They would follow his lead. He couldn't remember exactly when he'd become the leader of this outfit. Alistair was the senior warden. But other than offering advice, his brother warden always deferred to his lead.

Stay…or go? It was his choice. Why were they here? What were they really doing in the bowels of the earth? Aedan closed his eyes and tried to recall Duncan's words, the few phrases and snippets of advice he'd managed to impart before Ostagar. Would Duncan be down here in this hole chasing ghosts? Would he see it as doing a Grey Warden's duty to protect humanity? Did they stand a chance against the darkspawn horde without their dwarven allies? Aedan couldn't decide. He was so tired he could no longer draw the distinction between his duty to humanity and his word, given to one man. His word. He had given his word to Bhelen.

He opened his eyes and looked at Alistair. Though they were all waiting for his decision, it was to Alistair that he addressed his answer. Aedan said, "I gave my word. We find Branka."


	5. Chapter 5

_Used some game dialogue in this one, changed it up a bit here and there and added comments from party members where appropriate._

_(Part Five)_

When they found she Branka didn't seem to be insane. They had just exited the tunnel, which spilled out into cavern littered with cascades of fallen rock. The boulders appeared to have been piled up to form a wall. There was a loud grating crash behind them.

Aedan nodded at Zevran and the rogue slipped back toward the tunnel to investigate.

When he turned back toward the cavern Oghren was exclaiming, "Shave my back and call me en elf! Branka? By the Stone, I barely recognized you!"

Aedan followed the direction of Oghren's gaze and saw Branka standing atop the piled stone wall. She was regarding them curiously and greeted Oghren with surprising lucidity. She did not appear tainted.

"Oghren. It figures you'd eventually find your way here. Hopefully, you can find your way back more easily," she said.

Aedan shuddered at the thought of the journey back. Branka addressed him next, "And how shall I address you? Hired sword of the latest lordling to come looking for me? Or just the only one who didn't mind Oghren's ale-breath?"

He heard a sharp intake of breath behind him and turned to see Alistair looking indignant. The warrior opened his mouth, but Oghren beat him to it, "Be respectful, woman! You're talking to a Grey Warden!"

"Ah, so an important errand boy, then. I suppose something serious has happened. Is Endrin Dead? That seems most likely. He was on the old and wheezy side," Branka responded in a droll tone.

Though Aedan bristled at being called an 'errand boy' he knew better than to respond as such. He simply stated their case as clearly as possible, "His heir, Bhelen, seeks your support to become king."

Their conversation began to spiral away from reason at that point and as Branka raved and ranted about cretins and the nature of politics Aedan took the opportunity to gauge the reaction of his companions. He could see he was not the only one to suspect Branka was not as entirely sane as she had first appeared.

The look on Oghren's face saddened him greatly, the dwarf looked in turns hurt, confused and exasperated. What had happened to their marriage? Had it been compromised by Branka's mad ambition? Aedan couldn't help glancing sideways at Leliana. She was following the exchange between Branka and Oghren, a serious look on her face.

Branka's raving reached a fever pitch as she described the Anvil of the Void. Apparently it was very close, but sequestered behind a series of devious traps designed by Caridin himself. Spittle flew from her lips as she exclaimed, "I have given up everything and would sacrifice anything to get the Anvil of the Void!"

Aedan winced in memory of just what this woman had sacrificed and the now familiar nausea roiled in his gut. He heard the gasps and shocked breaths of his companions and knew he was not the only one so affected by Branka's words. As the dwarf paused for breath, her shoulders heaving back in a self righteous posture, Aedan put in quietly, "Does that include Hespith and the others of your house?"

Branka turned her furious gaze on him and Aedan rocked back at the force of her anger. Her expression seemed to yell, 'They failed me!'

She simply replied, "Enough questions!"

Alistair muttered behind him, "I don't remember asking any questions…"

Branka continued, "If you wish me to get involved with this imbecilic election, I must first have the Anvil. There is only one way out, Warden. Forward. Through Caridin's maze and out to where the Anvil waits."

Oghren shook his head sadly, his shoulders stooped with pity, "What has this place done to you? I remember marrying a girl you could talk to for one minute and see her brilliance."

Branka simply replied, "I am your Paragon." Then she turned on her heel and strode away from them, across the rocks and out of view.

Alistair blew out a breath. Oghren grumbled. Sten was fiddling with the side of his armour and Wynne was attempting to bat his hands away, murmuring, "Stop fussing."

Morrigan wore a smirk which she turned upon Aedan and as their eyes met, she raised her brows as if to say, 'I told you so' and looked away. Zevran materialized from the shadows and stepped to his side.

"The tunnel is blocked, we will not be returning that way," he said.

Aedan swallowed over a sinking feeling and nodded toward the spot where Branka had stood only moments before. He sighed softly and said to no one in particular, "On we go…"

Though there was a sense of relief at having actually achieved their goal, finding Branka, Aedan was not cheered. He couldn't help but feel their hardest tests awaited them. He glanced around at his companions. They were all exhausted, but they had no more time to rest. If they wanted to succeed in this mission and acquire the aid of a paragon, they must follow Branka to the Anvil.

He led the party around the wall, seeking entrance into the cavern and they found another tunnel. It was mercifully short and they found Branka's camp on the other side. It was strewn with bodies, dwarven and darkspawn alike. There were short gasps of surprise behind him, but Aedan did not take his eyes from the vista before him. The extent of Branka's madness was now fully apparent. She _had_ sacrificed everything, even her sanity, towards this goal.

He did not have long for contemplation though as the fine hairs along his arms and neck rose and he sensed the taint. Darkspawn were approaching. Alistair whispered behind him, "I sense darkspawn…" and the sound of weapons being drawn followed.

The darkspawn spewed forth into the camp from a tunnel located on the far side. The companions engaged. They defeated the first wave only to be caught up in the second, and then a third.

Aedan was exhausted, his arms were numb and each swing of his blade grew weaker, less effective. His concentration faltered and an axe caught the side of his helm. He saw stars and felt the ground shift beneath his feet. Something hit the back of his head with a ringing whack and when his eyes opened again, he saw only the dark ceiling above him. He was lying on his back.

He rolled to his side and pushed upwards, gaining his knees and finally his feet. The world spun dizzily and he staggered forward, looking for his next target. What he saw instead nearly drove him to his knees again. Leliana was splayed over a crate, her head thrown back and her arms hanging limply. Her bow had dropped to the ground. Standing upright in chest was an arrow driven in just below her collarbone.

Aedan forgot the battle as he stumbled toward her, his legs moving sluggishly as if he were wading through mud. He reached her side and his blades fell unnoticed from his gauntlets as he reached up and pulled his helm away from his head. He looked over his shoulder, looking for Wynne, or Morrigan, for anyone, but he could only see Alistair and Shale and they were engaged with the final foe, an ogre.

Aedan stared at the ogre and knew he should be there, he should be helping to fell the behemoth, but he was frozen in place. Alistair delivered the final blow and the ogre was down. Aedan slumped with relief and quickly turned back toward Leliana. He removed a gauntlet and felt for a pulse at her neck. It was there, but so faint! He knelt beside her and slipped an arm beneath her head, lifting it slightly. He whispered her name, there was no response.

He looked around for one of the mages again. Alistair and Oghren were sheathing their weapons and picking their way back through the mess of corpses. Alistair stopped and knelt down. He shook something gently and then helped Zevran to his feet. The rogue was unsteady and limped painfully, one hand on Alistair's shoulder for support.

Aedan felt a movement and he looked down, Leliana's eyes were open and she said, "Aedan, it hurts…"

"Sh," He whispered and stroked her cheek. He bit his lip and kept his face calm, hoping to reassure her. He didn't think the arrow was near her heart…

A hand landed upon his shoulder and he looked up, startled, it was Wynne. She looked like death itself, her skin so pale and translucent he felt sure he might see through it. He hated to ask, but he did, his voice cracking, "Help her, please, Wynne, help her."

Wynne told him to pull the arrow out slowly and he tried to steady his fingers on the shaft as he drew it out. He could feel it pulling against her flesh and faltered, and then he pulled again. It came free with a wash of bright red blood and he moved to put his hand there and stop it. Wynne restrained him and waved her hand there instead, sealing the small wound. The mage then swayed upon her feet and fell backwards.

Alistair caught Wynne and laid her down gently before moving to Aedan's side and placing a hand on his shoulder. He said, "The ogre was the last, I'll check on everyone else."

Aedan nodded and bundled Leliana up in his arms, pulling her toward his chest and holding her close. He prayed that he would not lose her down here. He didn't know if the Maker could hear him surrounded by all this filth and corruption. It had been a while since he'd last considered his faith. But he drew upon it now and tried to believe that whatever the outcome of their quest, all would not be for naught.

There was a whisper of movement behind him and Morrigan was there, crouching over Wynne, passing her hands over the mage and chanting lightly. Wynne opened her eyes and the witch held out a hand, helping the mage to sit up, then sank down beside her, each of them looking as weary as the other. Slowly the rest of the companions limped toward them, weapons hanging limply from hands, armour battered and scratched, their steps heavy with fatigue.

Leliana stirred and Aedan pressed a kiss to her brow. He put her down, somewhat reluctantly, and sank down beside her. They leaned against one another silently. The entire party rested, some closed their eyes and some merely stared sightlessly at the tunnel entrance.

Aedan finally stirred and went to check on Wynne first. She was much recovered and reassured him she would be fine. He checked in with the rest of their party. All were well. They all had small injuries that had not yet healed, but they were whole. Such had become their life in the Deep Roads. They moved on.

The first trap was a room filled with gas. Zevran tried to close the levers while hidden in shadow. Leliana had wanted to help but Aedan pulled at her hand, keeping her back from the noxious green cloud. She gave him an angry glare but acquiesced. Zevran could not hold stealth against the gas, however, and the trap was tripped before he could locate all the shut off valves. He was thrown to the ground by a wakened golem and Leliana tugged her fingers from Aedan's grasp as the party rushed into the room, heedless of the fumes, to help him.

The golems activated one by one, but working together, they cut them down. Despite their fatigue, the worst injuries more bruising and bent armour. They left the room via another tunnel.

The next trap also involved golems, but now they activated in twos. Leliana shot him a defiant glance and took her place beside Zevran. Aedan realized he had to let her go, he had been shaken by her injury, but it had not been the worst the party had seen and they needed every able bodied fighter. He was tired and his concentration was shot, and he was not the only one. But the companions drew on their training and practice and split into their familiar teams, they trusted their skills and their allies and they overcame their foes. Again, they took no more than a battering and some bruising and all remained on their feet.

Aedan made a point of stopping at Leliana's side before they left the room and quickly took her hand. He whispered a quiet apology to her. She squeezed his fingers and gave him a warm smile. He touched her cheek, but knew that now was not the time to talk. Trust, he had to trust her and their team. Leliana had always been competent in battle. He drew on the focus Alistair had taught him and moved forward.

The next trap was more devious and Aedan could not discern the pattern to it. They slashed away at the ghostly spirits, moving around the four-faced carving in the centre. It wasn't until Oghren sat on one of the four anvils placed about the edge of the raised dais, and subsequently releasing a cloud of black smoke toward one of the stone faces that they figured it out. They worked quickly after that and succeeded in deactivating the stone faced column. A door swung open on the far side of the cavern and they moved toward it.

The corridor was short and opened out into a large cavern. Aedan's breath was taken away by the sight before them. The cavern was lit to a golden glow by the flow of lava that circled it and behind a collection of golems, at the end of a narrow outcropping of rock, he could see what he suspected was the Anvil of the Void. It was a moment both like and unlike that when they had first seen the Urn of Sacred Ashes. Once again, they had brought a legend to light.

The centre golem, the largest, stepped forward. The movement closed gaping mouths and refocused thoughts as the companions all drew their weapons again. Then the golem spoke.

"My name is Caridin. Once, longer ago that I care to think, I was a paragon to the dwarves of Orzammar."

Mouths gaped again and stances faltered. Not one legend, but two stood before them. Shale was the first to voice thought, "Caridin? The paragon smith? Alive?"

But the surprises were not yet at an end. Caridin responded with, "Ah, there is a voice I recognize. Shayle of the House of Cadash, step forward."

The companions all moved aside as Shale moved through the group and moved to stand before the paragon. Their conversation was nothing short of astounding. Shale was not only a dwarf, but a woman! She had volunteered to become what she was now. The rest of the story was hauntingly familiar, a king mad with power possessing the tools of destruction. The Anvil of the Void had been used to seal living souls inside golems. They had created an indestructible army, but not without cost. Then Caridin had defied his king, refusing to sacrifice more lives, and had undergone the blow of the hammer himself and was now forever entombed in a body of metal.

Caridin wanted them to destroy the Anvil.

Before Aedan could respond to the golem's request a voice screeched from the behind them, "No! The Anvil is mine! No one will take it from me!"

Branka had arrived. Her madness and obsession were now clearly apparent as she railed at them as fools out to steal her glory. Aedan could feel the situation slipping from his grasp. He needed the support of a paragon to break the deadlocked dwarven assembly. But to gain the support of Branka he must preserve a tool akin to blood magic. He knew that even the Grey Wardens had used blood magic when it was deemed necessary, but he couldn't help the sickening shudder that took his shoulders at the thought he might be responsible for recovering a tool such as the Anvil. There was a fine line between doing whatever was necessary to defeat the Blight and whatever it took to protect humanity. Aedan chose humanity.

He said, "The Anvil enslaves living souls. It must be destroyed."

A gravelly voice informed him of Shale's approval, "So it fights with Caridin? Good. That seems right."

Aedan glanced around at his companions and he saw that they all agreed with his choice. Morrigan looked thoughtful, but had not spoken out. He was unaccountably relieved. Destroying the Anvil was not going to help make Bhelen king, it was at cross purposes to their current quest, but it was the right thing to do. They would just have to find another way…

Branka threw back her head and howled, and Oghren shivered and quickly turned to Aedan, asking him, "Just give her the blasted thing! She's confused... maybe once she calms down, we can talk to her."

Aedan shook his head sadly at Oghren and said, quietly, "No. That's not a risk I am willing to take." He half expected Oghren to side with Branka then, to abandon their cause, but the dwarf merely nodded as if his answer had been expected and remained at Aedan's side.

There was shuddering and shaking then as Branka waved a control rod and activated several of the golems. The final battle had started.

Aedan noticed the absence of Leliana's arrows as he helped Alistair destroy the second golem, but he did not turn around. His heart was thudding in his chest, but he held his focus, chanting his new mantra of 'trust, trust, trust' silently in his head as he moved with Alistair toward their next target, who proved to be Branka herself. She was standing over Oghren, who was flat on his back and she was preparing to swing her weapon down upon him. Alistair rushed her with his shield and though he failed to knock her down, he prevented the killing blow. Aedan helped Oghren to his feet and together they joined the fight. One by one the other companions closed in on Branka, she was the only enemy left. They killed her.

Aedan looked up then, his heart heavy. He glanced around quickly for Leliana and saw her sheathing her sword and dagger. Her arrows had stopped because she had drawn her blades. He felt faint with relief and then was quickly ashamed of his selfish thoughts. They had killed someone dear to Oghren. He turned back toward Oghren and placed a hand on the dwarf's shoulder.

Caridin spoke into the silence, "Another life lost because of my invention. I wish no mention of it had made it into history."

Oghren grumbled, "Yeah, you ain't kidding. Stupid woman! Always knew the Anvil would kill her."

Caridin and Shale spoke about the battle as one by one the companions offered their condolences to Oghren, quiet words and light touches.

Caridin then addressed them all, "Is there any boon I can grant you for your aid? A final favour before I am freed from my burden?"

Aedan turned to face Oghren and asked the dwarf, "Oghren? You lost Branka to this. What do you want?"

As Oghren made his case, Aedan shivered, though he was neither surprised by his request, nor Caridin's refusal. The paragon would sacrifice no more lives to the Anvil; Branka would not become a golem. Oghren accepted the decision with good grace and merely asked for Caridin's support in the election instead, a boon Aedan had not considered himself. The fate of the dwarven assembly had paled behind larger concerns…

Caridin made them a crown. Watching the Paragon set hammer to steel for the final time was something that moved them all. Not a word was spoken and not a sound was heard but for the ring of Caridin's work.

As Aedan lifted the hammer to destroy the Anvil as promised he felt a great weight lift from his shoulders. This quest had been full of unexpected twists and turns and had exposed him to unimaginable horrors, the worst of which had been created by those on a similar quest, to stop the darkspawn. He destroyed the Anvil. He didn't know if he would always see a clear path, or make the correct choice, but he knew this decision was the right one.


	6. Chapter 6

_It's the end! Yes, this is the final chapter …_

_(Part Six)_

The first bath was an exercise in futility. There came a point where Aedan wasn't sure if the filthy water was making any difference as he scrubbed at the ground in blood and dirt and what was that…? He rubbed at the mystery stain and put aside the brush. He called for a second bath.

Aedan fell asleep in the second bath. The water was warm and clean and as he sank into its depths he could hear the somewhat comforting sound of voices passing in the hallway, the muffled thump of something being dropped in the next room, the hiss and spit of the lanterns that adorned his room. Normal sounds, not the skittering of many legs or the shrieking moans of ghosts.

When he awoke the water was cool and he looked around himself in surprise. His fingers were a little numb beneath their wrinkled skin and it took him a moment to clamber from the tub. Clean clothes had been laid out across the bed for him and his armour had been set upon a stand. It was also clean. How many people had been in and out of his room while he slept… in a tub!? Granted the tub was screened from the main chamber, but he couldn't help shaking his head in wonderment.

Aedan had just finished dressing when there was a soft knock at the door. It was Leliana. He smiled broadly and stepped towards her, preparing to take into his arms. But the expression on her face stopped him short. She looked…apprehensive.

"Leliana, what has happened?" he asked.

Leliana shook her head softly and gave a wry smile before saying, "Apart from spending the better part of two weeks in the Deep Roads, you mean?"

Aedan chuckled and took another step forward. He pulled her into a close hug, resting his cheek against her head. Her hair smelled clean and fresh and he inhaled the scent of soap and woman with delight.

Besides having no baths, there had been little privacy during their time in the Deep Roads and he longed to kiss her properly, something more than the simple pecks to her cheek he had limited himself to in company of others. He bent towards her face but she turned away and said, "Aedan, I'd like to talk."

Her face was a mask of misery and Aedan's heart sank to the soles of his boots. His arms dropped leadenly to his sides and he found it difficult to draw breath. Talk? About what? He took a step back and regarded her carefully before asking again, "Leliana, what has happened? Is something wrong?"

Leliana's hands tangled themselves before her, and she looked down at her fingers a moment before speaking, when she looked up, her expression was one of forced calm. She said quietly, "Aedan, I know you care for me a great deal, maybe you even love me," her shoulders shrugged lightly.

Aedan opened his mouth to speak, he wanted to say, 'Yes, I do, I'm sorry I didn't say so sooner…' but she held up a hand and continued, "What we are doing is too important for you to be distracted. And I see that you are… have been… and I see how it pains you to choose between your heart and your duty…"

She continued speaking but Aedan had stopped listening to her words. He heard only his own thoughts, which predominantly consisted of no, no, no, no…

Leliana had stopped speaking and was looking at him quietly.

He said, "No… Leli, don't leave…"

Leliana blinked and said, "I'm not going anywhere…" she signed softly and said, "We are friends and we are a team and I will see this quest to the end with you. But I cannot sit by and watch you at cross purposes with yourself, because of me. Perhaps when this is all done…maybe afterwards, we shall see?"

She was looking at him seriously, but Aedan thought he could see a flicker of hope in her eyes. He took her by the shoulders and started to say, "I don't want…"

He was interrupted by a loud banging at the door.

Cursing, Aedan dropped his hands and moved to the door. It was Alistair. He beckoned urgently at Aedan and said, "The Assembly is in session, we must hurry!"

Aedan clenched his fists at his sides and took a deep breath. He leaned back through the doorway and said, "Leliana, I have to go."

She began with, "Of course you do…" but he quickly put in, "Can we talk more…later…please?"

She hesitated, and then nodded. He returned the gesture and stood on the threshold of the room a moment, simply looking at her until Alistair tugged his sleeve, urging him down the hallway.

"Where is Oghren, does he have the crown?" Aedan asked of him.

"He is waiting at the Chamber of the Assembly." Alistair replied as he urged Aedan to a swifter pace.

As they exited the Royal Palace, Sten and Zevran fell into step beside them and the four companions quickly made their way to the Assembly where Oghren was indeed waiting, crown held reverently in his hands.

Aedan could hear raised voices when the doors to the main chamber opened before them, but as they were announced a hush fell over the assembled deshyrs. Every head turned to face them and Bhelen asked, "Well Warden, what news do you bring?"

"I bring a crown forged by Caridin on the Anvil of the Void," Aedan replied and the hushed silence erupted into noise as the assembled dwarves gasped and exclaimed.

Steward Bandelor called for silence and Oghren took it upon himself to describe the outcome of their quest for a paragon. When he finished Lord Harrowmont stepped forward and gestured with his hands toward Aedan saying, "I would like to believe Oghren's words, but it is well known the Warden is Bhelen's hireling."

The disdain in the lord's voice was obvious, but though Aedan bristled he kept his tongue. This was not his place.

Bandelor had been turning the crown over in his hands as Oghren related his tale and he looked up at Harrowmont's words and called for silence. He said, "This crown is of Paragon make and bears House Ortan's ancient seal. Tell us Warden: whom did Caridin choose?"

Aedan swallowed drily, this was not how he'd imagined this situation. He'd hoped to pass the crown to Bhelen quietly, not become embroiled in debate. Caridin had not cared to hear the names of those involved, had simply told him to give the crown to the king of his choice. _His_ choice. Aedan held back a sigh of frustration as he briefly wondered why it had fallen to him to name a dwarven king.

Harrowmont was speaking, "Why would a Paragon trust someone who knows nothing of us with such a decision? This is preposterous!"

Bandelor turned to the lord again, silencing him with a gesture, his face clearly indicating his patience was at an end. He said, "We have argued in these chambers long enough. The will of the Paragon is that the Grey Warden decide."

Aedan realized this was not a simple matter of blood. This was a matter of character. He looked toward Harrowmont. The lord's face could have been a thundercloud, such was his fury. He was an older man, his hair a steely grey and his face deeply lined. Harrowmont professed to have heard King Endrin's last words, but he had also promised the same deed to two houses in order to gain their confidence. Did his word really hold so little value?

In contrast, Bhelen was young and vibrant. His icy blue eyes flashed with confidence and though his manner was cold and he was rumoured to have been ruthless in his pursuit of the throne, he was ambitious. He had innovative ideas and the energy to see them through. He represented change, something the dwarves were historically resistant to.

Aedan nodded to no one in particularly, simply confirming his decision to himself and said, "I grant the crown to Bhelen."

Bhelen crowed as he stepped forward to receive his due and not a moment passed with the crown upon his head before the dwarf challenged Harrowmont, demanding that he acknowledge his rule. Harrowmont acceded, bending his knee to Bhelen. Orzammar's new king was not satisfied, however, and he cried, "Then as my first act as king, I call for this man's execution!"

An excited murmur rippled through the assembled deshyrs and Aedan stood there wordless. He was stunned, shocked beyond speech. What had he done? Had he made the wrong choice in crowning such a ruthless man?

He heard a gasp behind him and then Alistair's voice rang out, "We did not give you that crown so you could be a tyrant!"

Bhelen's expression showed no remorse, only determination as he replied, "You know better than anyone the war facing us, Warden. Orzammar cannot afford to be divided. Anyone undermining my reign is serving only the darkspawn."

The ringing in Aedan's ears prevented him from hearing anything more as he helplessly watched Harrowmont being led away by guards. He could do nothing. This was not his city, these were not his politics and he deeply regretted having been involved. He turned and began to walk away, walking past Alistair and Oghren, wanting to leave the chamber altogether. His job was done, he'd seen enough.

Not only had he perhaps lost Leliana in this quest, he'd ensured yet another man's death. Was this what it was like to be a Grey Warden? Was his life from here on out going to be filled with impossible choices and self recrimination?

Alistair caught up to him and placed a hand on his arm. He said, "Bhelen seeks an audience with you at the palace…"

Aedan searched his friend's face, looking for the accusation, and echo of his shame, but he saw only concern. He said, "Would you go? I… cannot…"

Alistair nodded quietly and said, "Where will you be?"

Aedan said, "Tapsters, I think. I need a drink."

When Alistair, Oghren, Sten and Zevran entered the tavern shortly afterwards, Aedan was on his second mug of ale. He was pleasantly numbed and was finding it very easy to forget his troubles. He waved to his friends, indicating the empty chairs around him. Oghren called for more ale and the men heartily set their efforts to catching him up. Well, all except for Sten who picked his mug up, sniffed at it, took a sip, made the most expressive face Aedan had yet seen take those Qunari features, then set the drink back on the table.

Aedan chuckled and Alistair turned toward him, one eyebrow raised as if to say, 'Share the joke.' Aedan regarded his friend thoughtfully a moment and then said, "Is it always like this? Being a Grey Warden, I mean?"

Alistair's features clouded a moment and he said quietly, his tone consoling even, "No, Aedan, it's not. I forget you never got to meet the other wardens, you never got to see the good side of being one of the order."

Alistair went on to describe an evening where a warden from the Anderfels, Gregor, had challenged the rest of them to a drinking contest, downing a pint of ale for their every half. Everyone laughed along with him as he related his own failure to meet the task. But Alistair's face fell as he went on to tell how Duncan had found them all passed out, except for Gregor, who was still drinking.

Zevran must have sensed the mood spiraling downward as both wardens contemplated Ostagar and Duncan's death and he quickly said, "There is a game we play in Antiva, the rules are simple. All we need is a dagger and some ale."

Aedan looked up and caught the elf's eye. He reached to his belt and drew his dagger, his fingers a little clumsy with drink and he dropped it noisily onto the table top. A few patrons looked over worriedly at the sight of a weapon, but when it remained untouched the moment passed. The rules were simple, they took turns spinning the dagger and whomever the tip pointed towards would take a drink.

Aedan spun first. The dagger spun crazily and stopped towards Sten. Sten raised an eyebrow but refused to lift his mug. Alistair said, "The riddle-master of Lothering won't join us in a simple game?"

Sten merely stared at Alistair in response and the ex-templar swallowed drily and reached for the dagger saying, "My turn?" The dagger pointed towards Aedan and he dutifully took his drink.

Aedan began to suspect his companions were conspiring against him when the dagger pointed towards him again and again. He'd lost count of the number drinks he'd taken, the table top was littered with empty mugs and it had already been cleared once. He heard a hiccup next to him and looked over to see Alistair was swaying gently in his seat. Aedan grinned. Perhaps the game was not so rigged after all. It was his turn. He reached for the dagger and missed, then tried again, giving it an almighty spin. The dagger flew from the table, but he could not track it's trajectory as he had simultaneously launched himself backwards, falling out of his chair.

His head landed in something soft and when he opened his eyes, there was a dwarven face above his, a feminine and pretty one at that. He winked and smiled, saying, "My lady."

She gasped and pushed at his head and that's when he realized that he was on the floor, on his back, with his head resting in this lady's lap. He was hauled roughly to his feet and the world began to spin crazily as he was marched toward a door. He landed on his hands and knees in a darkened alleyway and gravity caught up with him. He leaned forward and vomited into the gutter. There was a bark of laughter behind him and then a gasping moan. Alistair then dropped to his knees beside him and proceeded to empty his stomach also. Aedan began to laugh. He threw up again, and then sat back on his heels and howled with uncontrollable mirth. Things grew increasingly fuzzy after that…

When he opened his eyes again he wished he hadn't. His head pounded and his mouth was dry, and there was the most awful sound ringing in his ears. It took a moment to realize the sound was not a result of his pounding head, it was Oghren snoring. He rolled over and came face to face with Alistair, who was snorting more quietly than Oghren. Where was he? Aedan blinked and rolled onto his back again, before carefully sitting up. He soothed his pounding temples with his fingers as he glanced around the small bedchamber. Oghren was propped up in a chair beside the bed, and Alistair was his only bedmate. Zevran and Sten were nowhere in sight. Aedan saw a jug of water and launched himself towards it, not even bothering to find a cup. After draining the entire contents he felt somewhat human again, though his head was still tender.

He began to suspect they were in Oghren's house, but rather than wait for his companions to wake, Aedan decided to take a walk. He had some errands to run before he left Orzammar and some exercise would clear his head. He also had some thinking to do. It took him a while to find his way through the alleys and passages, but eventually he located a staircase that led back to the commons and found his bearings. He was passing the alley that led towards Dust Town when he heard, "Psst, Warden…"

He looked over and saw a familiar face. The dwarf leaned in towards him and whispered, "I have that nug you wanted me to get, for your lady friend…"

Aedan's face fell as his heart sank. He'd forgotten about his surprise gift for Leliana. He'd experienced such joy in arranging it for her, she was so fond of his Mabari, Jack, and he knew she'd love one of these odd nugs for her very own. It was on the tip of his tongue to refuse the nug, to ask for his coin back, but the dwarf thrust the leash into his hands and said, "Here, take it…"

Aedan mumbled a 'thank you' to the retreating back and looked down at the nug. The animal made a grunting sort of squeak and looked back up at him. Aedan sighed. "Come on then," he said quietly as he gave the leash a gentle tug. He found the weapon smith and retrieved the sword, Topsider's Honor, which he'd collected the pieces for. The smith had forged it back together and it was a handsome weapon. Aedan smiled in appreciation as he caressed the hilt and the blade, it was a fine piece of craftsmanship. He planned to give it to Alistair as a gift. He settled the account and left instruction for the sword to be delivered to his room at the palace.

He wandered behind some merchant stalls then and leaned out over the stone railing, gazing into the depths of Orzammar and down to the flow of lava that swirled below the city. It was an awesome sight and one he became lost in as his mind drifted from one subject to another, mentally tallying his gains and his losses. He'd completed his quest. He and Alistair had raised an army. Now it was time to return to Denerim and crown another king. Aedan had no doubts that Alistair would be a good king. He was neither ruthless nor hungry for power. He was the right man to lead Ferelden against the blight. His mind was settled on this score.

He was still bothered by yesterday's events though, Bhelen's merciless action. He shook his head gently and sighed, he had to let it go. His word was given and honoured, his job was done.

Aedan had just begun to think of Leliana, when as if summoned by his thoughts he heard her voice behind him. "Aedan? Is that you? And why are you holding a nug?"

He turned around and saw her standing there. She was dressed in her drakeskin leathers and as always she was beautiful. The soft glow of light in Orzammar only highlighted her colouring, made her more radiant to his eyes. He felt a pain in his chest as he looked at her, a twisting in his heart. She did not meet his eyes, for which he was momentarily grateful. Instead she was looking curiously at the animal sitting at the end of the leash in his hand.

He held the leather strap towards her and said stiffly, "It's for you…I meant it to be a gift."

Leliana gasped and put a hand to her mouth. She took the strap from his hand and knelt down beside the nug, gently touching it with her free hand. She smiled and her obvious happiness tore Aedan's heart a little more.

She stood up and stepped beside him and said, "Thank you, Aedan, it's so sweet and thoughtful of you." Her smile faltered and they stared at one another in an uncomfortable silence for a few moments before she hastily pulled a wrapper from her belt and said, "Look, I found this for Morrigan…it's a mirror, just like the one she had when she was a girl." She thrust the package into his hands and said, "You should give it to her Aedan. You are her friend."

Aedan stared dumbly at the mirror in his hands and then looked up at Leliana. It was a sweet gesture on her behalf, so very selfless. Her thoughtfulness was just one of the many, many things he loved about her. He put the mirror aside, resting it on the stone railing behind him and turned back to her.

She was standing there quietly, her hands twisted before her. It was a habit of hers, this tangling of fingers. He'd hoped for a romantic setting for what he was about to tell her. He'd hoped not to have his heart all but shattered first. But he decided that now was the time, the best time to tell her how he felt.

He reached out and took her hands in his own. She looked up at him and he saw the apprehension in her face. He said, "Leliana, I love you."

Her blue eyes widened and she tried to pull her hands from his, but he held firm and continued with what he wanted to say, "I don't want to be friends, Leli, I want more, I want to continue what we have started." He paused and searched her eyes for any clue that she felt the same way before saying, "Already my heart is yours 'til death parts us, whether that happens next week or in thirty years. I cannot, I will not, take it back. My love for you will be my strength, not my weakness."

Tears glistened on her cheeks and he loosened one hand to touch her face. He took a hesitant step forward, his need to hold her nearly leaving him breathless. She hesitated, wiping at her eyes with her free hand, and then she stepped forward also and he circled her with his arms. He held her tightly and felt her arms slip behind him and clasp him as closely in return.

Aedan felt whole again, complete. He sighed gratefully into her hair as his heart filled. He wanted to stand here and hold her like this forever, but she was mumbling against his chest so he pulled back to hear her words. She said, "I'm so sorry, Aedan, I did not mean…I did not want to hurt you. I thought…"

She was stumbling over words and he smiled at her. She stopped and smiled back before saying, "Some bard I am… you seem to have a unique talent for robbing me of words."

Aedan caressed her cheek again, delighting in being able to touch her, and said, "So you'll stay then? With me, as more than friends?"

She smiled and nodded, and then with a teasing light in her eyes, she said, "I've always wanted to be more than friends …"

Aedan gasped in mock horror and said, "You felt the same way and did not do me the courtesy of informing me? Making a man spill his guts like that…"

She silenced him with kisses. The first was light, that merest brush of lips. She drew back, said quietly, "I love you," and then lifted her lips towards his again.

They stood together encircled in one another's arms and oblivious to the city around them until they were interrupted by a gravelly voice saying, "There you are! Will you two stop that canoodlin'! We got an archdemon to kill!"

Oghren had found them. The dwarf turned and yelled over his shoulder, "Warden, he's over here!"

Aedan drew back from Leliana with a resigned but happy sigh. He kissed her lightly one more time, and hugged her quickly. When he looked up, Alistair had joined Oghren and he laughed at the pair. They looked much worse than he'd felt that morning, but then again, they didn't have what he had. They hadn't had their hearts lifted by love. He took Leliana's hand and walked over to his friends and said, "Well, we had better not keep it waiting then."


End file.
